Wednesday, March 25, 2009


Sweet friends, I know there are many people in need of prayer right now... I think most of us are needing prayer in one area of life or another... but as I approach you in this moment, I would ask that you specifically be in prayer for some precious babies in a fight for their lives. Please petition the Lord on their behalf~ we know He hears and we know He heals.

I would also ask that you please pray for some of my most treasured friends as they are currently pregnant and about to give birth to sweet babies... babies following the loss of a previous child. I can assure you that it is extremely emotional to be preparing for the birth of a child after having one leave to be with the Lord, so I would ask that you keep Hannah, Emily and Kim in your prayers through these upcoming hours and days.

Thank you for praying and lifting up others you might never know this side of eternity...

"Save me, I pray..."- Genesis 32:11

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Weekend Update

It has been a ridiculously long time since I have posted... I guess it's time for a weekend update!

Faith Clare is now 16 weeks old and her personality is shining through! Her GI system seems to be much improved since we started probiotics 2+ weeks ago. (Thank you, thank you, thank you to those of you suggesting them for her!!) The difference that we have seen in her is amazing and in conjunction with me cutting out milk and all the prayers on her behalf, she is almost back to who she was the first 11 weeks of life :) Incidentally, we did have the Pedi GI appointment in the Med Center and although we didn't find out much, both the fellow and the physician strongly recommended probiotics based on numerous European studies... just in case you have a little someone in need of GI assistance.

Our little missy is still a really smiley girl who loves to watch her brother laughing and playing! She already knows just what she wants and she definitely communicates that with us, sometimes through "talking" but mostly through her screams of protest when we get it wrong! Truly, she seems to be much more demanding than Deacon ever was so she is already challenging us on so many levels. She absolutely insists on being held and carried but she isn't a "cuddly" baby at all. She despises being held like a baby (across you) even if she is really tired and doesn't like being where she can't see whatever "action" is going on around her. Oh my, and talk about despise~ the carseat is her ultimate disdain right now and she tends to cry after being in it for, ooohh, say 2 minutes. Plain and simple, it is just the biggest hate in her life. However, when she is happy and feeling good, man is she a treat! She loves playing on the floor, kicking her legs, grabbing hands and putting them in her mouth, and reading books. Her happiest time is in the morning after just waking up where she will "ooh" and "ahh" and tell you all about her night. Interestingly, she can go from happy and lovely to screaming and mad in 5 seconds which is why we have started calling her our "sweet and sour" girl. Many of you lucky ones have already witnessed this first hand!

Deacon is doing great and loves being a big brother. He is super helpful most of the time and often says "I can get that for you mommy" when I am needing additional hands. He always asks "Where is Faith Clare?" and then will head right to where she is to talk to her, usually saying "Hi Faith Clare, what are you doing??" He is an active boy, doing great in preschool and really learning a lot from all of his interactions with the other kids and teachers. He is pretty outgoing with those he feels comfortable with and is working really hard on his numbers and letters which makes mommy proud. Undoubtedly we have many 3-year-old moments that require redirection, discussion and consequences, but I wouldn't have it any other way... often they are the "teachable moments" that bring us back to the Bible and what Jesus has instructed for our lives.

And Maddox... well, I know that he is just perfect and filled with joy in the presence of the Lord. The weeks leading up to his birthday, back in the beginning of January, were difficult and like many say, the anticipation of the day was actually much worse than the day itself. As we debated what to do, a dear friend of mine who also lost a son gave me some very wise advice: break my day into thirds. She suggested spending some time alone to reflect on this journey with Maddox and his life, to spend time together as a family, and then spend some time with just Dusty. We heeded her advice and the celebration we had for Maddox was absolutely perfect.

Deacon spent the morning at school so I, in turn, spent a little time with Dusty and a lot with Faith Clare. Probably my most intimate moment of the day was holding Faith Clare and listening to By Your Side by Tenth Avenue North. I was so drawn in to the words of that song and as I sat there on the couch holding my newborn daughter, a clear promise from the Lord, I was just sobbing over her big brother. My tears were heavy and falling freely, streaming down my face and inadvertently landing on the sweet girl in my lap. Honestly, I could barely see through them and as they literally bathed her head, the only thing that I could see was her beautiful smile. A smile that lit up her entire face and made her eyes dance. Oh, what a beautiful memory ...A moment from the Lord... Him speaking clearly to me through the new life He had just blessed us with. His presence was clear and it is a time that will remain forever etched in my memory.

The rest of the day was wonderful as well. As I spent my alone time at the spa, relishing in my gifted massage and pedicure, I spent a lot of time thanking the Lord and thinking about all that He has carried us through. When I returned home we spent a few hours together as a family of four, enjoying the beautiful flowers, cards and sweet gift of cookies received from family and friends. We talked some about Maddox and told Deacon that Maddox was probably enjoying a huge birthday party in Heaven. He stopped, looked at Dusty and said, "When I get to Heaven, can Jesus share some of his birthday cake with me?" He brightened our day with those sweet words and we said we were SURE Jesus would share his cake and so much more once he got to Heaven.

The evening was fantastic as well. My grandparents arrived in town and spent the evening with the kids while Dusty and I celebrated our sweet boy's birthday with an amazing meal and wonderful conversation at The Melting Pot. It was a beautiful way to end the day and quite honestly, I was amazed again at how faithful the Lord was to answer our prayers for a peaceful, God-honoring day.

Overall, right now life is great. It is definitely more chaotic than I remember. I am definitely less patient than before. Two kids definitely feel like 15 some days. I definitely have less time to check things off my TO-DO list. I am definitely more tired than ever. The house is definitely less clean and the kids are definitely more dirty. There is definitely more noise than there has ever been... But there is definitely more laughter, more silliness, more togetherness, and more seeking the Lord in all things. And I am definitely feeling more BLESSED. The Lord is so good and I have been constantly reminded lately that this is a stage, and soon we will be out of it and on to the next thing. I am striving so hard to remember daily to enjoy this... because these moments are fleeting. Praise God for the JOY of living in TODAY.

"This is the day the LORD has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it."- Psalm 118:24
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